


Drift In Silence

by gaysinspace



Category: Pacific Rim (2013), Yuri!!! on Ice (Anime)
Genre: M/M, Pacific Rim AU
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-12-14
Updated: 2016-12-14
Packaged: 2018-09-08 12:52:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,734
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8845834
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/gaysinspace/pseuds/gaysinspace
Summary: Many people drift with mentors, others with lovers.For Yuri Katsuki, it turned out to be both.





	

**Author's Note:**

> This AU has been eating away at my brain for days, and I could finally sit down and write it!
> 
> As of right now, it is unbeta'd. I hope you enjoy!

Yuri Katsuki didn’t know what to expect when he stepped into the Shatterdome.

He expected an audience, pilot selections were usually a grand affair.  
He expected some news outlets, it made sense to publicise the successes of the program.

What he didn’t expect was to be surrounded by the most prominent pilots, all standing on the observation deck with cold expressions. What he also didn’t expect was the cameras, the flashes, the questions thrown at him as he made his way to the fitting deck.

He knew being a Jaeger pilot was the equivalent of being a rock star, but he didn’t expect public interest to be this high, specially not in him.

Celestino risked a gentle nudge at his elbow, giving him a look that spoke _stand up straight_. Yuri felt a cold bead of sweat roll down his back, trailing down his spine where soon he would connect to the giant beast before him. The newest Mark IV was beautiful, standing gracefully in its station with an air of grandeur. It had taken a lot of resources to make this jaeger happen, and Yuri felt a pang of pride at the thought of one day soon being able to meld with the titan. His pride was cut short with a reminder supplied by the back of his head: _it’s not yours. Not yet._

When the first kaiju attack occurred back in 2016, Yuri had watched with wide eyes as beasts rose from the depths of the ocean, math homework all but forgotten in a pile on the table. He’d crossed on to his 18th birthday watching the powers of the world pull together, creating a program so ambitious and grandiose all had expected it to fail. He entered his first day of university with the news of the jaeger piloting program still ringing in his ears, leaving no space in his mind for the lecture happening in front of him. There was no doubt in his mind that this was something he wanted to be a part of, something he could one day claim as his own.

The piloting program was selective, at first. Army officials were convinced only their military folk could take on the task due to their rigorous training. Their brains didn’t seem to agree, the successful drift rate falling steadily as days moved on. After the program was opened to the public, it become a success. People of all ages across the globe were going to their nearest Jaeger base to enlist, heads high and minds full of hope of maybe one day becoming a hero.

In the end, the pilots came from the most unexpected places. A bakery owner and his wife from Chile, a father and son from Indonesia. Most of the time, the pilots didn’t come in conveniently pre-made pairs. There was a series of tests ran on candidates after their enlistment, measurements of physical capacity along with neural ability to take on the load of drifting with a giant metal beast. Candidates would fight tooth and nail to get to where he was, waiting to meet his possible drift mates.

As Yuri made his way towards the front of the room, a familiar sight caught his eye and he felt his stomach drop, a cold feeling of dread settling in his gut. He avoided the silver eyes that followed his path down the room, focusing instead on preparing for the drift.

Victor Nikiforov had been one of the first recruits of the Jaeger program, and also one of the biggest surprises. He was tall, lithe, long silver hair flowing down his shoulders, often tied in a ponytail as he made his way through the base. He was the image of grace, not of war. Not of fight. In the beginning, no one thought the Russian 22 year old would amount to anything.

Victor spent the next five years thoroughly proving them wrong.

To say that Yuri looked up to Victor was an understatement. To him, Victor was the image of everything he aimed to be: committed, graceful, a fighter from the start. He watched as Victor climbed his way through the selection process, and then as he climbed his way up the pilot ranks. The day he watched Victor climb into his Jaeger was one he wouldn’t forget. He was the image of bravery, standing in his deep burgundy pilot armor preparing to go into battle. Victor was nothing short of the perfect poster boy for the resistance.

So Yuri trained, and then he trained some more. He kept training until he knew how to control every muscle in his body, until he whipped his limbs into submission. He meditated until he learned to take control of his mind and his memories, until he learned how to coexist with them. The importance of not chasing them down a path deep into his subconscious was highlighted to him on every possible occasion. When he joined the program, he was pinpointed as a promising recruit.

Celestino took him under his wing, a test pilot deeply instructed in the art of drifting with a jaeger. He took Yuri and built him into a machine powerful enough to match the ones he aimed to stand within some day.

It took four long years until he was deemed ready. To say he passed every evaluation and test he was subjected to was an understatement. The world was ready to watch Yuri succeed.

If only he could find the right partner.

With a slight shake of his head, Yuri dismissed the thoughts of the past to where they belonged: in the past. He was taking steps towards his future, coming face to face with Director Feltsman. The man had a stern look on his face, and he extended a calloused hand towards Yuri as he took in the man before him. Yuri had never been particularly muscular, had never particularly excelled at any field in his teenage life. He was awkward, gangly, his glasses slipping down his sweating face whenever he was faced with public exposure. But there was no time for that Yuri now, he had worked hard on expelling him from his mind. Today he was Yuri Katsuki, future pilot of the Jaeger program.

Director Feltsman, or Yakov as most of his recruits took to calling him, had a hand in training four of the program’s most distinguished cadets, one of which was Victor himself.

“Katsuki Yuri” he spoke as a greeting, Russian accent rolling heavy on his tongue. Yuri offered a cold nod in response, mind racing ahead to glance at the row of cadets standing to his right.

“These are the drift candidates the program has selected for you. Every person in this line excels in their simulations and matches your neural abilities to the highest point.”

His eyes scanned the men and women in front of him, his hardened stare softening at the sight of his training mate Phichit Chulanont. He hoped dearly that, if anything, it could work out with him.

Yuri barely registered as Yakov and Celestino exchanged some quick words, beginning to drown out the noise around him. With horror, he recognised the pull of anxiety clawing at his mind, slowly making its way towards his body as he began to shake gently. He felt Celestino’s hand guiding him, then all there was was silence. He drowned out everything around him, mentally picking out the thorns anxiety had woven into his sides. Memories of Hasetsu came back to him, threatening to pull him back from the dream he had chased for so long.

Stepping onto the platform, hooked into the newest Mark IV, Yuri felt himself lose control of the threads of his mind. On his right he saw Phichit step on to the platform beside him, workers quickly hooking him up into the system. He knew that Phichit could see right through him, feeling cold disappointment work its way into his brain at his weakness. Allowing himself a small smile at Phichit, he prepared to be plunged into the darkness.

———

The drift is silence. The drift is comfort. The drift is hiding under the covers on a stormy night. It’s the katsudon slowly working its way down his throat. It’s coming home to the bath house, the familiar feel of steam on his skin. The drift is darkness.

Yuri felt his mind divided, the threads of his memories in Japan threatening to tie a noose around his throat and pull him down, down, down. He mentally cut the threads, watching memories of his mother pass by him without as much as a second glance. Phichit was present, pulling at one edge of his mind as he made room for his own memories and thoughts. Below that he felt the powerful, metallic pull of the machine below them. There was only this between him and his dream.

He catches a glimpse of brown fur, the sensation of a wet tongue making its way across his cheek. Yuuko stands in front of him, flush in her teenage years and suddenly he’s back where he was that day. He’s outside the pet shop, Vicchan licking away at his face as he hears the shrill voice of his friend.

_It’s just like Victor’s!_

And then he’s chasing the rabbit, too far gone to notice the familiar pull of Phichit in his mind has disappeared.

———

There’s more candidates after Phichit: four of them, to be exact. They go as quickly as they came, Yuri feeling their enthusiasm fade to hard disappointment in his own mind as he feels their drift come to an abrupt end, the echo of Yuuko’s voice making his ears ring. He is helpless as he watches Yakov clasp his hands behind his back, walking out of the room with a group of superior officers. He is numb when they come to free him from the machine, tears threatening to spill down his cheeks. All he feels is the cold sting of failure as he is berated by Yuri Plisetsky, the words _disgrace_ and _undeserving_ filtering their way into his mind.

He is powerless to speak when he feels a pair of grey eyes try to catch his gaze, turning on his heel as he allows the tears to flow freely from his eyes.

Yuri Katsuki didn’t know what to expect when he walked into the Shatterdome.

But it was certainly not this.

**Author's Note:**

> Regarding age:
> 
> Yuri is 17 when the first kaiju hits in 2016. He is 19 when he joins the pilot program and 23 at the time of this chapter.
> 
> Victor is 22 when he joins the pilot program, and at the time of this chapter he is 27.
> 
> Find me on tumblr at otxbekaltin (YOI blog) or my main blog, edwardnvgmas.


End file.
